Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?

Do married people live longer than single people or does it just SEEM longer ?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

Sooner or later, doesn't EVERYONE stop smoking?

Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?

War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left.

After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If someone has a mid-life crises while playing hide & seek, does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow, but only to be troubled and insecure?

Is there another word for synonym?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Just "before" someone gets nervous, do they experience cocoons in their stomach?

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their picket signs?

When you open a new bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder Why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

Why Isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?

If you lived in the Dark Ages and you were a catapult operator, I bet the most common question you would get asked is 'Can't you make it shoot farther?' 'No, I'm sorry. That's as far as it shoots.'

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, 'God is crying.' And if he asks why God is crying another cute thing to tell him is, 'Probably because of something you did.'

I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose a king I hope they don't go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

In stead of giving 'answers' on a math test, they should call them 'impressions,': and if you got a different 'impression,' so what, can't we all be brothers?

Why do we drive on 'parkways' and park on 'driveways'?

Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made of two separate words: 'mank' and 'ind'. What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to teach them some tricks. But only if you're serious about adopting the vulture.

Consider the daffodil. And while you are doing that I am over here going threw all your stuff.

Most of the time it wa probably real bad being stuck down in a dungeon. But some days, when there was a real bad storm outside, you'd look out your little window and think, 'Boy, I'm glad I'm not out in that.'

Broken promises don't upset me. I just think, why did they believe me?

Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're yanking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.

If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now.

When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got courious about it. I picked it up, and started wondering who the person was, and why they had horns.

I can picture in my mind a world with out war, a world with out hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.

Even More Thoughts to Ponder