 |
| Behind every successful man is a woman - with absolutely nothing to wear. |
| Appreciate me now and avoid the rush. Ashleigh Brilliant |
| Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. Ogden Nash |
Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats
 to pull a sled through snow. Jeff Valdez
|
| Curiosity killed the cat but for a while, I am a suspect. Steven Wright |
Experience is that marvellous thing that enables you recognize
a mistake when you make it again. F. P. Jones |
| Food is an important part of a balanced diet. Fran Lebowitz |
| Get your facts first, then you can distort them as much as you like. Mark Twain |
| Give a man a free hand and he will run it all over you. Mae West |
| Grey hair is great. Ask anyone who is bald. Lee Trevino |
| He is a member of the effluent society. Stinking rich. Barry Phelps |
| Hi, I've heard so much about you, now I'd like to hear your side. W. Philips |
| I always say, keep a diary, and some day it'll keep you. Mae West |
| I am a deeply superficial person. Andy Warhol |
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian
because I hate plants. -- A. Whitney Brown |
I am rather like a mosquito in a nudist camp; I know what I ought to do,
but I don't know where to begin. Stephen Bayne |
I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has
income and she is pattable. Ogden Nash |
| I can resist everything but temptation. Oscar Wilde |
I don't understand why girls who wear wigs, false eyelashes and padded bras
always complain that there are no real men anymore. |
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes - and six months
later you start it all over again. Joan Rivers |
| I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something. |
I have learned only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy.First,
let
her think she is having her own way. Second, let her have it. Lord Snowdon |
| I keep reading between the lies. Goodman Ace |
| I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign. Mae West |
| I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. |
I love you from the tip of your nose to the tip of your toes. And all
that lovely stuff in the middle too. |
I personally stay away from all health foods. At my age I need all
the preservatives I can get! George Burns |
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. Rita Rudner |
I think Shakespeare is overrated. After all, all he did was string together a lot
of old, well-known quotations. H.L.Mencken, on Shakespeare |
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